No longer going to work can be a mixed blessing for some people. However, if you are single, the prospect of social isolation that may result from stopping work can be daunting. Men in particular say they lose contact with people after leaving work. If the majority of your friends are work-related, you should consider developing strategies to stay in contact or develop new or existing interests that will help you to make new friends.
The circumstances that led to your retirement may influence how well you adjust to your new lifestyle. If you haven’t prepared yourself adequately, you may find you become disenchanted and this could have an impact on your wellbeing and enjoyment of life.
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Example
Fred had worked for a large hardware store for years. He was popular with the customers and his work mates. When his wife died after a long illness, a few years before he had planned to retire, he sold their home and bought a caravan and took off around Australia. He planned to travel for the rest of his life. He couldn’t stand being in one place for too long, without his wife. Fred had given up his work to care for her and he missed her so much now. After the first six months of travelling, the novelty wore off. He found he missed his mates he’d met through work and his local pub. He realised that he hadn’t been prepared for the earlier retirement and that travel was not going to fulfill his life forever. So he made his way back across the Nullarbor, and returned to Perth to live in the caravan near the coast. |
Retirement for those living with a partner can also have its difficulties. Retirement changes the family environment. Some men have said one of the first things they had to learn upon retirement was how to talk to their wife again. Some women, who have perhaps had many years running the house almost single-handed, are disrupted by their husband’s sudden intrusion into their routine.
Consider:
- agreeing to do some things together;
- agreeing to do some things on your own; and
- agreeing to share some of the household responsibilities.
Retirement can test a couple’s compatibility. It can also be an opportunity to make up for lost time – a second honeymoon perhaps.
With more time available, you may choose to help more with the care of your grandchildren. Men in particular say they appreciate the extra time they can spend with their grandchildren in retirement – perhaps making up for time they didn’t get to spend with their own children.
Discuss with your family how much time you are willing to allocate to looking after your grandchildren. After all, this is your retirement. It’s good to play a major role in their lives, but if it stops you from doing the things you have longed to do all your working life, then review the situation.
When Gina retired, she had already increased her recreational activities because of the extra time she had over the last few years when she had reduced her working hours. She joined a book club and a women’s walking group and a local voluntary group caring for a local bushland reserve, an extension of her interest in growing native plants. Retiring for her was easy. She was still connected to the community through her interests and her daughter Maria, who had married a few years earlier, had just had a son, Clark. Gina loved caring for him when Maria and her partner, Wayne, went out once a fortnight. She was strict about that. She made it clear that just because she no longer worked, it didn’t mean that she didn’t have a life of her own.
Some grandparents do not have a choice. Full-time care of grandchildren can occur through an accident, death, divorce, substance abuse, imprisonment, abandonment and child abuse. These situations are stressful for grandparents and their grandchildren who must adapt to the change of circumstances. It is not unusual for all concerned to experience feelings of confusion, insecurity, anger, sadness, grief, guilt or relief. There are a number of grandparent support groups in Western Australia. For further information, call the Seniors Telephone Information Service between 9.00am and 3.00pm weekdays on 6217 8855 or 1800 671 233 for country callers.
Grandcare (Wanslea Family Services Inc) runs a program designed to support those grandparents with responsibility for caring for their grandchildren. The service offers a telephone information line, practical assistance, informal counselling for grandparents on a range of issues and links to other community resources. Support groups are held throughout the metropolitan area and in Mandurah and Albany. Call 1800 008 323 between 10.00am and 3.00pm weekdays or go to www.wanslea.asn.au
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As life expectancy rates rise, it is likely that more of us will need to care for our ageing parents at some time or other. If you retire in your 50s or early 60s, it may well be that you have parents who will need a little more support than in their former years. It is not always possible, or indeed desirable, for some families to have their parents move into an aged care facility. However, it is hard work caring for someone who may have a chronic illness, physical disability or who has dementia.
There are a number of support services available for carers. The Carers Counselling Line provides carers with access to qualified counsellors who can provide practical assistance, referral and emotional support 24 hours per day, seven days a week. Call 1800 007 332 or go to www.carerswa.asn.au.
The State Government funds Carers Association of WA to run the Health Awareness and Retreats Program. The program enables small groups of family carers to take a break from their caring role through social activities and gatherings. Carers are able to establish informal networks that can assist in providing emotional and social support. Contact the Carers Resource Centre on 1800 242 636, 8.30am to 4.30pm Monday to Friday or go to www.carerswa.asn.au.
As a carer, you may also be eligible for a Carer Payment or a Carer Allowance. Contact Centrelink on 13 27 17 or go to www.centrelink.gov.au for further details.
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